Marianne Gutierrez: Health Practitioner: Marriage and How to Avoid It by Guy Thomas Blews

Marriage and How to Avoid It by Guy Thomas Blews · 16 August 2006

Marriage and How to Avoid it
By
Guy Thomas Blews

This was aired on GMTV this morning – Wednesday 16th August 2006.

The Presenter began by asking viewers to text or email their thoughts about an aspect of this book: Men cannot remain faithful in a marriage. The author’s point is that men are programmed not to be faithful to one person, therefore in a marriage remaining faithful would be impossible for them. When interviewed he also said he thought it was equally impossible for women.

I haven’t read the book and perhaps I should, perhaps it is one of those titles that totally contradicts itself and comes out in favour of marriage eventually. But the reason I say anything now is because of the images and feelings the title itself stirs up and the very fact that GMTV is stirring up the nation with the meaningless text/email surveys.

OOOO perleaze! Do we really need any more fodder for generations to play fast and loose? Causing unwanted pregnancies, disease and a breakdown in trust?

No-one is saying marriage is easy. It isn’t.

No-one is saying that everyone should get married. They don’t have to.

However if you want safe sex then you should be married! How’s that for a statement!

But to be serious, I believe the point of marriage is to create harmony within oneself. Marriage satisfies many human needs: company, sex, eating. All those aspects are better, more rewarding and life enhancing with a stable, long term partner. I really believe that anyone who has been married, and then ‘run away’ from it would say they regret what they did and have ended up lonely and unfulfilled.

Marriage is stabilising. It centres and focuses. A faithful spouse brings trust and sincerity. Personalities are bettered by each other in a ‘good’ marriage. You learn and grow in a happy marriage. Children procreated in a faithful, happy marriage are stable, centred and happy, with an ability to move forward with their lives. They in turn create their own happy, faithful, trusting marriages and a happier, faithful community results. Isn’t it peace and harmony what we all seek? It all begins with the home life.

Men and women may find it difficult not to stray within a marriage but that makes them cowards if running away to the first person who listens to them is their answer, instead of staying and sorting the problems out. I believe it is ‘problems’ within a marriage that causes men (and women) to seek after another person and have an affair.

It is not a fact that men (or women) are programmed not to be faithful to one spouse. The fact is that those people who have affairs are incapable of dealing with the problems that undoubtedly arise within a marriage.

It is not that men (and women) are programmed not to be faithful, it is a fact (I think) that some men (and women) are cowards and will not stay to sort their marriage problems out.

I am a christian and can see why God wants us to honour the marriage and home life. But even from a ‘humanist’ point of view, good marriages make sense for each other, the children and the wider communities.

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